


Pipe Cleaning

by everyshootingstar



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M, hinted Scott/Allison - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-26
Updated: 2015-05-26
Packaged: 2018-04-01 07:03:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4010365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everyshootingstar/pseuds/everyshootingstar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Holy shit, you can definitely fix my plumbing anytime you'd like,” It slipped out before Stiles could stop it, but really, the plumber was absolutely gorgeous. Six glorious feet of solid muscle and those arms, jesus.</p><p>“I'm Derek,” the plumber—now Derek—said, holding his hand out to shake Stiles'. “I understand you're having some troubles with your bathroom?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pipe Cleaning

**Author's Note:**

> I am so sorry for the title, I am so sorry or all the references to cleaning pipes. I just. 
> 
> Enjoy.

“Holy _shit_ , you can definitely fix _my_ plumbing anytime you'd like,” It slipped out before Stiles could stop it, but _really_ , the plumber was absolutely _gorgeous_. Six glorious feet of solid muscle and those _arms_ , jesus.

“I'm Derek,” the plumber—now Derek—said, holding his hand out to shake Stiles'. “I understand you're having some troubles with your bathroom?”

Shaking Derek's hand, Stiles felt himself get a little lost for a moment at the pure _strength_ behind the grip and how _warm_ his hand was. Jesus Christ.

“Bathroom?” Derek said again, amused as he let go of Stiles' hand, “You mentioned that the toilet backs up, right?”

“R-right!” Stiles said, blinking slowly for a minute before shaking his head. “Of course, the bathroom. It's uh...the toilet'll flush but it barely goes down I think there's a leak somewhere, when it gets too hot you can smell uh...rotten sewage.”

Derek nodded, “I completely understand, Mister Stilinski. I'll go ahead and check it out now, see what I can do before my friend gets here. Are you going to be here all day?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Stiles said, “I work from home, I'll be here uh if you need anything just let me know. I'll be glad to _assist_ you.”

It was suggestive as hell but really, Derek was a _plumber_ , he wouldn't see him again after this mess was fixed...besides, a little flirting never hurt anyone, right?

Derek just chuckled before nodding and turning away from the door and damn if Stiles didn't watch him walk away because _damn_.

\---000---

 

As one with Stiles' sort of luck would have, plumber Derek and his friend— _this is Boyd, he's better at running pipes than I am—_ and Stiles didn't really need to know that sort of thing about _Boyd_ , he'd rather know about _Derek's_ ability to _run_ pipes, _we're going to have to replace thirty feet of pipe, unfortunately. You've got a hole here and there's a couple of busted ones under the house._

 

It sucked yeah, but Stiles definitely got to see plumber Derek dig into his front yard where the main septic line ran, got to see those _wonderful_ arms of his in action because god damn this was better than any porno he'd ever seen.

 

Boyd just stood off to the side, casual conversation flowing between them as Stiles sat on the couch in the living room, watching them out the window. It was creepy and Stiles normally kept to himself when it came to having maintenance done on his home but well... _Derek_.

 

Stiles didn't have the windows up since the AC was running, but he could read lips pretty good if he really concentrated...not that he was sorta eavesdropping on plumber Derek and Boyd's coversation...they were both extremely attractive men and Stiles was hopelessly bisexual and sorta on a dry spell so in his _casual_ perusing of the two fine pieces of male physique, he just happened to catch bits and pieces of their conversation which seemed to be about... _house repairs?_ Pretty damn boring.

 

(Although Derek could probably talk to Stiles all day about his busted septic pipes and Stiles would gladly listen because _damn_.)

 

\---000---

 

The third day of work, Derek arrived early in the morning, around eight am and Stiles wouldn't have even known if he hadn't been up all night in a fit of insomnia, so he was sort of delirious when he went outside and leaned against the front banister of his porch, watching Derek's back muscles move under his shirt as he dug a trench around one of the central pipes.

 

“You are definitely a work of art, dude,” Stiles said, feeling particularly brave and a bit foolish...he was so bad at this but well, he was shameless, and he wouldn't see Derek anymore after all this was over anyway. “I mean damn, how do plumbers even get as buff as you are when you're unclogging toilets and fixing sinks?”

 

Derek turned around and shot him an amused look, “Well, I'm not really a popular plumber...”

 

Stiles swore, “Fuck, really? Can I pay you extra to come over here whenever I get something stuck in the sink drain? Maybe I can personally contract you to clean the hair out of my shower drain whenever Lydia comes over to use my shower.”

 

“Well, I'm not sure that's in my job description,” Derek said with a little snort, turning back around to start digging again.

 

“That is a _damn_ _shame_ ,” Stiles said with a disappointed little noise. “I mean fuck, you are too hot for a plumber. I feel like I'm starring in a porno or some bad hallmark movie where the female lead falls in love with the male lead who is unlike any other male on the Earth.”

 

Derek snorted again, a quiet little laugh escaping his lips, “I see,” he said. “Are you? The female lead I mean.”

 

“What? Hell no, I'm not into the whole bullshit love thing. I may be persuaded to be in the porno though,” Stiles said with a leer, leaning farther over the banister so he could watch Derek's ass. “Why don't you have a uniform anyway? Like are you one of those privately contracted plumbers hired by my landlord?”

 

“You could say that,” Derek said, “You never see your landlord?” he asked, curiously.

 

Stiles rolled his eyes, “Hell no, dude's illusive as fuck. When I called in about the problem, some lady answered the phone, his sister I think? Said she'd tell him and he'd send a plumber out and well, here you are.”

 

Derek finally finished digging and tossed the shovel aside, climbing out of the hole, “I see,” he said after turning around and looking at Stiles, “Well, I can't do much else until Boyd gets here but I'm going to need you to not use your water until we're done. Which should be today if all things go well.” Derek glanced up towards the sky where rain clouds were starting to build up, “It would be advisable to finish today or else we'll be flooded out.”

 

Stiles hummed and his eyes followed the line of Derek's throat, licking his lips and wondering briefly what Derek's stubble would feel like beneath them. “Yeah,” he said distractedly.

 

“You look tired, Mister Stilinski,” Derek said, looking at him again, amused expression taking over his features, “Maybe you should get some sleep. I think I can handle it from here. Not that your wonderful conversation isn't _stimulating_.”

 

Stiles blinked slowly and swore softly, “Okay, fuck you,” he said, “That was low, dude, low as fuck. It's too early to play with my brain. I thought plumbers couldn't flirt with their customers.”

 

Derek laughed this time, a loud and happy sounding laugh that made Stiles feel funny, “Only if you ask nicely, _Stiles_. I don't have any sort of rules holding me back from...doing those sorts of things.”

 

The entire conversation up until this point finally came rushing back to Stiles' poor, tired, sleepless brain and he swore loudly, “I'm just going to leave you to it then,” he said. “If you need anything, just knock.” he said quickly and retreated back into his house, closing the wooden door behind him.

 

Outside, Derek was still standing there, looking at him through the window, an amused smirk on his face.

 

He swore softly and all but ran to his bedroom where he could be mortified— _and jerk off—_ in peace. Thank _god_ for blackout curtains.

 

\---000---

 

Stiles woke up about three hours after the _mortifying_ experience of half-asleep flirting to his front yard being empty and he sighed in relief as he sat down heavily on his couch, still feeling tired and groggy from his short nap.

 

He hoped that he never saw hot plumber Derek ever again, even though part of him wanted to, wanted to _explore_ that sort of thing, that flirting _thing_ that Derek was doing, the fucking _smirk_.

 

Stiles groaned loudly and let his head fall back against the couch, the mortification going through him right now threatened to eat him up. “Can I just rewind the past few days and do it over?” he wondered outloud, just as there was a knock at his door.

 

The thought of ignoring it passed through his mind briefly, but he knew that he was supposed to actually _encourage_ human interaction even if his anxieties didn't want him to.

 

He snorted as he got up, “For someone willing to flirt with their plumber pretty shamlessly, I'm sure as hell chickenshit about answering my own door,” he mumbled as he walked over to he front door and pulled it open.

 

...speaking of plumber.

 

“Uh, did you forget something?” Stiles asked hesitantly, pushing the glass door open so Derek could hear him, “Not that it's troublesome to see you or anything,” he added quickly, cursing himself once again, for having no filter.

 

Derek laughed the same laugh he'd laughed earlier in his front yard, the one that made Stiles feel weird. “I'm just here to inform you that since your septic problem was a pre-existing problem that neither I nor my inspector caught before you moved in, I'll reduce your rent for the month to compensate you for putting up with it. By half, so you only owe half rent on the third instead of the full thing.”

 

Derek's words finally caught up to Stiles after several long minutes of silence and he blinked, “Wait, what?”

 

“You only owe two hundred dollars this month, Mister Stilinski.” Derek repeated. “I'm reducing your rent by half, fair compensation, right?”

 

 _Oh no._ Oh _fucking_ no.

 

“You're my landlord.”

 

Derek snorted, looking amused, “Yes, I'm your landlord. We've met before, when you moved in six months ago.”

 

Stiles felt the mortification creeping back up on him double time, “Oh _god_ I flirted with you thinking you were a plumber, oh my god.”

 

“Now I'm hurt, if you knew that I was your landlord you wouldn't have flirted with me?” Derek asked with a raised eyebrow. “I wasn't joking about having no sort of rules or laws saying that I couldn't _flirt_ with tenants.”

 

“ _NO_!” Stiles said loudly, nearly banging his elbow painfully on the glass door as he moved to get past it, “No, no, it's not that I just—” He let the door close behind him and he paused, trying to collect his thoughts, “I'm an idiot.”

 

Derek shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans— _the tight as fuck jeans that showed off his ass so fucking well—_ and leaned back against the banister, “You really are,” he said and Stiles deflated a bit, _of course Derek would think that, he probably should start looking for a new place to live or something it was going to be so awkward now..._

 

“But its endearing and _maybe_ not atall one sided.”

 

“Wait, what?” Stiles asked, blinking slowly, “Are you saying...”

 

“That if that offer's still on the table to _unclog your drains_ then I'd definitely be interested in being contracted out as a _personal_ plumber.”

 

“Holy shit,” Stiles said again for lack of better words.

 

Derek still looked amused but it was a fond amusement and then he was narrowing his eyes a bit and moving in closer to Stiles until Stiles was pressed back against the screen door.

 

Derek must have taken a shower, Stiles thought, because he smells like some sort of bullshit, cliché woodsy smell that probably came from some manly man body wash that was suddenly Stiles' new scent.

 

“Are you going to show me your pipes, _Stiles_?” Derek whispered close to his ear, smirk on his lips as he felt the shiver run through Stiles.

 

Stiles squeaked and fumbled around behind him, cursing the sticky handle on his glass door as he pushed the damn thing open, making them tumble inside. “Fuck, this way, it's this way,” he said in a rush, grabbing Derek's hand and dragging him towards the bedroom.

 

Derek just laughed again, the same damn mesmerizing laugh that was suddenly Stiles' favorite sound, and let himself be led through the house, alreading knowing they weren't going _anywhere_ near the bathroom.

 

\---000---

 

_oh my god scotty I just slept with my landlord_

_**what dude gross I dont care** _

_holy shit I thought he was my plumber but he's my fucking landlord_

_**seriously bro I don't care, stop it** _

_...i listen to you gush about allison 24/7 so deal with it_

_**right. It was sex, bro, don't overthink it. Obviously he wanted it too** _

_**...hey maybe see if he'll reduce rent** _

_**you know, in return for the hot sex** _

_**bro?** _

_**Bro?** _

_**You're having sex again, aren't you.** _

_Alssdlkdsfkdsfkd my pipes are thorougly clean, holy shit_

_**fuck you stiles, that's disgusting** _

_;)_

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Ahahahahahahahaha so funny story about this one. This actually happened to me, the septic troubles I mean, not the flirting, but long story short, we've had toilet problems and we called in our landlord ~~my landlord is an asshole tho????~~ and he came along with his friend to fix it. 
> 
> Except I sorta spent the first two days they were here thinking that my landlord was in fact, the plumber, oops. 
> 
> So, my lovely bb helpfully suggested this: _'i thought it was a plumber doing the work on my kitchen sink so i shamelessly hit on him in several lewd ways because i thought i'd never see him again but he turned out to be my landlord' au_ and well, ahahaha it happened. So this is for you, bb  <3 I hope you feel better soon <3333
> 
> and if you're interested, well, [my tumblr](http://lifeofstiles.tumblr.com) is here.


End file.
